You'd think I had it all: Pro hockey player ✔️ Great family ✔️ Emotionally available for a girlfriend ✔️
Except I might be cursed. Bad stuff just happens to me.
I fell asleep only for someone to draw genitals on my face? Pictures go viral.
I got a spider bite, should be fine right? Got it right on my balls aka now melons.
Found the perfect woman? She's my team captain's younger sister.
I'm a goner for Sunny. Obsessed. Head over heels.
I will do whatever it takes to have her forever, even if her brother does try to remove me from this earthly plane.